AdventVoice 2018-03-20 20:27:55 (Updated 2018-03-21 07:58:52)

We have a lot in common, I've noticed.
Same motivations. A desire to see if I am reflecting what I tell people or if I am a hypocrite and can correct something. That kind of question is out of a desire to probe myself from the reflections of others. Holding to the fact that each of us can paint a picture with words to describe the other from the little we know about them.
For example, I have not seen my son's mother in years and can you imagine she knew who I was from the few posts I left. At first I was a little upset, I thought I had matured enough to where I can talk about anything I want, change names, places, locations, just tell the story right. LMAO she could pick me out of a line up from me simply speaking and I could wear a mask like Lelouch Lamperouge and she would still know it is was me speaking. I thought after the years and different experiences would have changed how I view and speak on things. In some cases time has done that, but it has not changed how I speak and I think that is what she picked up on.
She was really upset that I did not reveal myself to her. She was upset that I did not trust her enough. So we don't speak. For now. I hold out that she has read a lot of my messages and will let me see my son soon. It was a great experiment though. After nearly 8 years and not having seen me and thinking I might be dead, a few clicks and posts later she is screaming at me about not telling her who I am and where I have been. Though it can be said I have been doing that, just under a different name, and because I am so long winded, I really don't know how to put in 1-3 sentences "Who Am I" to any real satisfaction because I could have sworn I was not the same person from 8 years ago.
I think of myself from 8 years ago and well I did not do as much art back then, I did not sing as much as I do now, I did not live well, like I am living now and aren't these the things that help us grow?