I have an artistice love affaire that I can not share with my family.

Friends like @Qira @NyanaCreation @HeadMistressSeven  @Cyberdevil @ThiefOfVoid @Dahila-K @bmesias063 @Spedmallet @CohensKleineMotte

@XwaynecoltX  @Linda-mota and my numerous fans make my avenue of expression here on NewGrounds that much more enjoyable and sacred because it is something I don't talk to with anyone else to or that, I can. It is nice to know they are around to lend an ear.  Oh, my family know that I am artist and have had this raw talent since I was young. What they don't know is...well maybe they do~ I don't know what they know~ All I know is I am so tired of being haunted by the idea of them never knowing of  the wonderful things I can do with my hands.

   To be in a home where everyone asks you, "What do you think about this? How do you feel about that?" Knowing they would never understand because they have never been where you have been or desire to listen.

This idea that movies, books, prose, art and liturature is just not popluar anymore and our generation does not have the patience to ingest all of the information that is infront of them or wants to has never hindered me from producing a few thousand pages of works that I hid under my bed or in volumes, none will see until....

That is an open-ended possibility and dealing with unimagintive people in my daily life makes me all the more greatful for Newgrounds and all it has to offer for us creative writers and illustrators. An inactive imagination is so disturbing to think about. You mean to tell me, there is nothing but what is in front of you that matters. Half the reason why hanging out with "Dead-Head's" did not last too long. The same chords for a musical number with not desire to cut a chord or breakthrough a monotinous routine would set me off. My artistic expression has been set on an idea of breaking limits. erradicating our comfort zones, Insisting that none of us   die with our music still inside of us.

When I was 17 I had a dream that spurs me to this day. I was roused from my slumber and could not drown the pain of it. Even a blazing hot shower. When I was done I was so red, the steam took an hour to fade from my face. Blood wailing, I swore to myself I'd do everything in my power to never be a 35 year old, made to hide from the world because I suffered from a lack of purpose. In my dream I slept in my mothers basement on her couch because of all the excuses that have filled the world with defeatisim to the brim.

  I never wanted to be made to stand in someone's soup kitchen as Olvier Twist, asking for a, "L'ill More?" Never!

I did not like the idea that "to be humble," meant no ambition and I would be demonized for it.

I have befriended an artist by the name of Emma Visca. She is a Scottish artist dubbed "The Naked Painter," who loves to quote Allen Ginsberg, who said, "Follow your inner moonlight; don't hide the madness." She has epilespy, but you would never know it. With this condition: (and I really don't like using the phrase but due to my lack of a better expression I am forced to suggest her extra brain activity is such) she can devise methods of creation that allow for a:

Countdown to her exhibition at Gracefield Art Centre for Spring Fling 26th-28th May 2018. Come along to Bonnie Scotland and spend some time with artists from Dumfries and Galloway. If you happen to be in her neck of the woods I would suggest supporting her.

Then there is Ed Piskor: Author of the New York Times best-selling series Hip Hop Family Tree.  who I really want to get to know or at least send a letter to  one day and just let him know how much his art is appreciated by artists like me that believe in the Freedom Of Expression.

This list goes on and on of the number of men and women that have the gift and I suppose one day I would love to put all of them together in one folio volume and find myself through my artistic expression in the back, tucked away nicely in the number or artists that refused to "Die with their music still inside of them." I want so much to share this ambition with my family because no matter how secure we are in our lives we should always seek to push the envelope and reach for the stars.

Natasa Ilincic is from Edinburgh Scotland and she is a wonderful artist with a real smooth style. I always imagine Elfin Lied Opening theme song Lilium to fill her home as she draws. She has just that fine-tuned a hand.

This is certainly what fills my own home as I contemplate on the next discourse I can express through the white canvas. I was 5 years old when my father asked me, "Son, what do you want to do with your life?" I was 5 years old when I told him, "I want to give the world art and keep them dreaming of a better tomorrow, remind them of why we hunt for prosperity, I want to give the world hero's." I stayed in Comic-shops for a long time in my youth. Studied every mode of expression I could find. Then I heard there were those seeking to stomp out the need for liturature, prose, poems, art. So my love for art became intertwined. Believing if she is not fulfilled then I must satisfy her.