Well as of yet, few have been able to explain to me, where lies in the idea of “gender equality,” among NSFW detractors, who suggest “The illustrating of a penis is too explicit?” These detractors will make room for lesbian, gay and alien sex, but have a hysterical fit if you illustrate the actions of a ‘normal,’ and healthy heterosexual occurrence.

 As of late the idea of being hindered artistically out of fear of offending some majority consensus that attributes “adult,” art with that of a ‘lesser,’ caliber of literature or avenue of story telling and degrade it further by suggesting the illustration of a penis is more concerning than that of breasts or clitoris of female form, has me feeling stifled. Highly isolated, stuck in a corner and made to sit in detention because I said penis.

 After contemplating the illustrated short story of my past and present affections towards Victoria, I realized I have very few to share these events with or the illustrations. Considering many find this style repugnant and then there are those that have no use for heterosexual relationships. It has gotten so bad I read in a gamers magazine, months ago, of how Steve Hogarty just can’t stand the need of game developers to incorporate NSFW material into the dialogue and special sequences. He went on at length as to how he as a homosexual just could no tolerate the hero and heroine displaying sexual urges.

Modernlove@newyorktimes.com by  Helen Schulman, author of “Come With Me,” recently wrote an article based on the premise of “What her life might have been had she not married her husband.” Similar to the theme of the 1998 Gwyneth Paltrow  film, “Sliding Doors.” A chick-flick that I never would have allowed any of the women in my life to watch, lest I had to be made aware of their hidden, promiscuous fantasies.

The Christmas Season is full of these notions of, “Window Shopping,” fever. We walk by the expensive shops and in out minds ponder what our lives would be like if we had that expensive accessory. There was a time when people where no more than expensive accessories to me. I had enough in my pocket to turn my window shopping excursions into reality and never pondered long of what my life would if I had that person in my life.

 This Christmas season is shockingly different though. I’ve been pondering what would it be like to have Sarah the Switch Hitter and TTFPH in my life. Who at the moment are different than any video game character, or movie star, or fantasy of my mind that I can not really touch. Sarah was created at the behest of a friend. She like any other Futanari had to navigate this Christmas and holiday season by enjoying the company of those that respect and love her. Which according to Jeffery Kluger will become harder and harder in an Administration willing to roll back protections set for this scientific anomaly.

 The strains placed upon an artist and writer for discussing the activities that occur after too many spiked egg nogs between a man and a woman are intense. The NSFW community is attacked verbally by an increasingly aggressive religious community. Women like Stormy Daniels, honestly can not expect the glamour of Democrat support to last for very long. For in the presence of political debate, anything she achieves in the field of smut will be frowned upon by delegates in the House and Senate, no matter how many adds suggest “men should support #HeFORSHE.org.”

 I have been navigating the underground for a long time and as the writers before me Marquis De Sade, Robert Crumb, Maggie McNeill, my library is extensive, I have believed in the joy presented in eroticism. My only misgivings is, “How the world will see me, if they know, I would not mind taking TTFPH and Sarah out for dinner and a movie on Christmas Eve and getting them presents to put under the tree?” There are so many stories and songs and tales that support heterosexual love, open relationships, common law marriages, dating with no intention of marrying, relationships of women over the age of fifty with men barley in their second year of college.

Yet none would admit that they would take a Futanari and make that person their Christmas wish. I have seen the support given to lesbian relationships, the butch with the lipstick lesbian is a part of the HIP-HOP culture and is insinuated and glorified in every aspect of Cardi B’s music in hopes of out witting Nicki Minaj’s appeal.  Accolades are given to two beautiful ‘she-males,’ who are willing to display themselves as an item. I just have not heard enough of two she-males in an open relationship desiring to have a three-some with a male that loves the way their hair falls around the curve of their neck and the lusciousness of their lips around his hard dick. This year I have my misgivings that come with opening this door, because I am a man of particular tastes. I would never settle for an unattractive woman and I think the same expectations of sensuality should be held for the she-male. If I fill my stockings with this wish, I would hope they would have the same desire. To be with someone that makes them nut from simply looking at them.

 Because I am an artist, honestly I love to communicate through the internet and I love dirty talk. I would like to think that if I can make someone nut intellectually, with my words and the images I display, then I have achieved a level of promiscuity that exceeds the games we are able to play while ‘sexting.’

I used to sext at lot when I had a phone but I don’t use the phone anymore. Too expensive. I no longer skype as much as I used to in college. I never did get any Futanari’s to find me interesting during college and how could I? We could do nothing in public, we had to wait for Halloween parties or Freak-Nick’s or the college parties that nearly cost Brett Kavanaugh his seat on the Supreme Court. There is a whole world I miss at times from my youth that as I age, I will no longer be apart of. I love the idea of being able to illustrate this one Christmas wish, though.

Stephanie Zacharek presents Freddie Mercury’s ‘multitudinous sexuality,’ as a conundrum that should be a handicap that is to be ignored. Constantly she reminds you that he was married to Mary Austin and deeply in love with her, as if anyone ever questioned that. She asks, does it depict his sexuality in a way that’s acceptable to all? Then asks who is qualified to say?

She suggests Rami Malek’s performance as the Rock God was difficult based on his disorienting gazes, not hidden by editing. He is quoted in suggesting coming out as gay, “Was like an astronaut re-entering Earth’s atmosphere and finding the ride to bumpy he barley survives it.”

Hollywood has turned “Queen,” into an LGBTQ history lesson but I am a man that loves women, has had children and grew up with the Rock Ballard’s of Bohemian Rhapsody in my home since I was four years of age. I am not gay and I love my Zanzibar Parsi, icon of legend.

To end this discussion, I want it understood that real love, true love, a Christmas love can breach barriers built by the limitations of man and returning to Earth from orbit of the mind does not always have to end like the OCT 11th  2018 crash landing of the Soyuz Space Shuttle.